Ten things I’ve learned from my favourite Christmas tunes

Note: I normally hate Christmas music.

  1. “Song for a winter’s night” – Gordon Lightfoot: songs about love can make you feel lonely when you’re single. But sometimes, it’s nostalgic and nice.
  2. “Oogie Boogie’s song” – Nightmare Before Christmas: bad guys love jazz.
  3. “All I want for Christmas is you” – Mariah Carey: I really like Mariah Carey. I can’t help it.
  4. “Christmas time is here” – Vince Guaraldi (Charlie Brown Christmas, Arrested Development): sad songs can be hilarious in the right context. Sad things too.
  5. “Christmas in Hollis” – Run DMC: Hollis is a sucky place to live, even during Christmas. But at least it gave us this song!!
  6. “Fairytale of New York” – The Pogues: this song is the best, and maybe only, way to get a mixed group of drunk liberal-minded people to shout “faggot” in the best possible way. Not that this should really ever be anybody’s goal…
  7. “Feliz Navidad” – Jose Feliciano: I recall as a child hearing a parody of this song with the chorus “police got my dad”. The moral here is that even the most innocuous song can have a racist parody.
  8. “You’re a mean one, Mr. Grinch” – How The Grinch Stole Christmas: a movie can be great even when you are meant to hate the protagonist, as long as the protagonist has something either redeemable or identifiable about them.
  9. “Dick in a Box” – Andy Samberg and Justin Timberlake: I don’t care if a song is a fad. It can still be hilarious.
  10. “Heard it through the grapevine” – California Raisins: some things that you loved when you were a child are still watchable as an adult. Some things, sadly, are not.

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