Ten things I’ve learned from the gym locker room

  1. There are ‘naked guys‘ and there are ‘afraid to be naked guys‘. The former strut around clothesless, chatting away. The latter use a towel like a forcefield, desperately trying to put on underwear.
  2. Men who brag loudly about sexual exploits are, most of the time, lying. It’s not hard to tell.
  3. Why do some guys leave their stuff in an unlocked locker? Really? A lock is that expensive?
  4. Posing in the mirror after a work-out is fun, but looks so dorky. It’s even more dorky if the guy posing is also taking pictures of himself in the mirror.
  5. Even when I don’t say a word to anybody else, I feel like a real man in that locker room…just hanging out with a bunch of dudes. Bro-ing it up.
  6. Don’t sprawl your stuff everywhere and then walk away. This isn’t your bedroom.
  7. Don’t pee on the toilet seat and all over the floor. This isn’t your….whatever room in which people think that’s ok.
  8. Canada Flag tattoo? Check. Tribal shoulder piece? Check.
  9. Human bodies are pretty weird initially, but after a while, weird becomes normal, you know?
  10. Don’t look at that penis, don’t look at that penis, don’t look at that penis…holy crap look at that penis!!

1 Comment

Filed under tenthingsivelearned, Uncategorized

One response to “Ten things I’ve learned from the gym locker room

  1. Doing shows is always a side of skating that I’ve loved, it’s the performing. I get to do that without the pressure, it’s always fun between the skaters and the preparation, the show is always so much fun.

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