Ten things I’ve learned from hosting stuffed animal parades with my sister as a child

  1. Stuffed animals love being in parades.
  2. Many stuffed animals are named after the type of animal that they are. For instance: “bear” “owl” “big mouse” “fluffy bunny”. Other animals are named “Mr. Soldier” or “Sally”.
  3. The parades we held always had a trio of bad guys trying to stop the parades from happening. Those bad guys were invisible, and were named “toothbrush” “hairbrush” and “sink”.
  4. Stuffed animals are cool, cause they are relatively gender-neutral toys. Also: Lego.
  5. Gund stuffed animals are the top prize. My sister and I would save up allowance money to be able to buy Gunds from our local Beaches toy store.
  6. I know a lot of siblings used to fight as kids, but my sister and I got along pretty well. We were both pretty weird, I guess. Still are.
  7. When you host a stuffed animal parade, set up the animals in your hallway, two by two. That allows you to move the parade one line at a time.
  8. I’ve always liked parades. I think it’s the American in me. That being said, I really like Pride and Caribana specifically. So…that must be the gay West Indian in me.
  9. Children, when left alone, will invent games that do not make sense. That is because children are fundamentally irrational. When we get older, we are still irrational, but we do our best to impose reason on our fractured psyches.
  10. Sometimes actual animals try to get in on the parade, and ruin everything. GET OUT OF HERE MYSTERY!! YOU’RE NOT INVITED!!!!


Filed under tenthingsivelearned, Uncategorized

3 responses to “Ten things I’ve learned from hosting stuffed animal parades with my sister as a child

  1. Very funny. Love No. 3.

  2. Bunny and I loved this post!

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