Ten things I’ve learned from being at the cottage

  1. Rocks are sharp.
  2. Television is over-rated.
  3. Looks can be deceiving. A giant spider might be more interested in hanging out on some wood than bugging/biting you.
  4. Hanging out on wood is a popular bug activity. Ants, spiders, termites, earwigs…they all love hanging out on some wood. Consequently, if you don’t like bugs all that much, you might want to avoid piles of wood.
  5. Cheap romance and mystery novels often end up in piles at the cottage. Being bored, I have read the first few chapters of several of these novels. These are not well-written novels.
  6. Cheese curds are delicious. If you disagree, you are crazy! Or lactose intolerant. Or unused to squeaky food.
  7. Showers are under-rated.
  8. You can bond with people who are on the other side of the political spectrum over all kinds of things: kids (if you have them), mosquitoes (if you don’t like them), beer (if you drink it). Then, while bonding, they might say something reactionary to get a rise out of you, and you kind of have to laugh it off. It can be….awkward.
  9. Don’t ever go to Leech Island. Ever.
  10. When you are a kid, and a man named Rotten Ricky vrooms over to your dock in a powerboat, and asks if you and your younger sister want to go on an unsupervised ride to the small, creepy island that he owns, the answer is always: hell yeah!

1 Comment

Filed under tenthingsivelearned, Uncategorized

One response to “Ten things I’ve learned from being at the cottage

  1. 11. How to have very very very quiet sex. Or have everyone hate you.

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